I am sitting with some bros eating some food.
I notice out of the corner of my eye one of my friends opening up the back of his head with his hands. His head is hinged at the front and can open from the back.
He systematically stuffs some spaghetti noodles into his head.
He closes his head.
changing lightbulb to 65 watts instead of 75 watts.
halogen lamp began to sizzle so i turn it off and i look up and there are WORMS
then suddenly MAGGOTS IN MY HAIR and when i brush them they come out ahhh and i hear FLIES IN MY EAR!
SO I GO TAKE SHOWER TO WASH THEM OFF IT SO SCARY
then i am at gbc with some friends except it is like at crossroads. the lady swipe i have no mealpoints so i say use debit
i have to katch up to my friends, simmern is there and kathleen. simmern throws a basketball at kathleen who fails to catch so i catch, i drible and it's hard to dribble especially with cars on the left side on street, i afraid basketball will roll to them.
we pass a couple of cop cars and one undercover cop car and now instead of walking with friends i am in car with family.
we are suspicious of cops might break into gang war but we keep going to our destination thing at bottom of hill.
we get out of car, dad goes somewhere, sister goes into house.
gang arrives, weeoo police siren, a fight break out, so we yell for christine to come out of house and she come. we all get into car to pick up dad i want to get into driver seat b/c more control, bu whatever i in back.
mom drive around real slow and weird. i see dad so we uturn to get him. he is like at concentration camp working and not allowed to leave. but we call him over because we are going to rescue him. but he only reluctantly comes over. we beckon him in and mom and him give a sort of "sad smile" almost as if they know the plan will not work and we are all screwed.
mom drives surprisingly slowly as if under control, posessed, by some entity, to try to make us fail. finally i try to help ou by unbuckling my seatbelt and i want to floor the gas pedal with my HAND but as i reach over CHRISTINE restrains me and starts to tickle me and do weird-ass motions with herself. i'm like wh are you restraining me we have to escape and she's like "hehe because i'm a weird girl hehehehehe" nd i'm like oh no my sister si under the influence of the posession entity demon thing too. and then finally big brother is taking over my mind and i feel the laugh coming on "huh huh huh huh huh" as a groan escapes from me in real life.
The following chronicles an "affection generating dream" that is common in high school and less common in college. It was my brain trying to get me to have feelings for this girl via my subconscious. It felt wonderful (at least the very first part).
For privacy purposes the name of the girl in this dream has been changed to "Bla."
tl;dr version (raw post-dream writing):
Playing piano duet with crush Bla fast escalation I half-kiss her cheek easy, she has to leave and i'm like doh she no like, but then she's like "ur not coming?" so I go w/ her to elevator. then she turn into guy along with girl that Jeff also likes and both try to drug us, w/ smarties. I become sad that Bla is actually a dude. 6'2" white guy. But nothing is certain and universe keep shifting I call her later and she denies ever having been a white guy, also later on every time I call her it's like someone else answers, her identity changes, almost like shifting parallel universes like one guy all like "well she does live in my residence please hold"
as I sobering up Liz finds blue jacket from wardrobe (at first she only found stupid mascot costumes) "Liz don't u have anything less conspicuous" I comment on shifting universes and Liz momentarily becomes a white woman I don't know. Back home, writing my dream, stale potato chips, surprisingly accurate w/ my facts.
Long version: Instead of posting a long-ass story I will just elaborate on the ambiguous sections:
Throughout the dream the parallel universes keep shifting in and out of phase, sometimes overlapping with each other. That's why every time I called Bla I got a different response: In some universes she is in love with me, whereas in others she does not even know who I am. In some universes she doesn't live at that phone number's location, whereas in others she lives in a coop and another man answers the phone and tell me to hold.
In one universe, Bla is actually a tall white guy, hanging out with Jeff's crush (who also turned into a tall white guy, incidentally). Both try to drug Jeff and me with drugs that taste like smarties.
Later in the dream I feel cold so I need a jacket from Liz. Liz is a rich woman friend with an extremely large wardrobe. Her closet is the size of my room. Nonetheless she can't find a suitable jacket for me; all she has are mascot costumes, like the Cal bear or the weird red pepper thing. One of her costumes is an orange giraffe. I say, "Liz, don't you have anything less conspicuous?" I finally go home with a blue windbreaker.
Near the end of the dream, I thought I had already woken up. I was writing down the details of my dream to remember them. Surprisingly, none of these details were wrong. I must have been in stage 1 and retained all of my cognitive abilities. I finally woke up for real. Writing down my dream details in my dream definitely helped transition the memories from dream-state to waking-state. I could actually visually remember some words I wrote down near the end of the dream, and verify that they indeed happened earlier in the dream.
Raw text (tldr version):
Pop out flowers salmon poison strip accidental in mouth back in time correct, but still aftertaste. Professor says imposs to correct because of Heisenberg/Schrodinger riddle/questions involving schrodinger cat. students say it will correct but professor is right. another girl dies I start throwing up, sort of feel it is dream but not sure
With details ("I like reading Max's dreams" version):
At an expensive restaurant, I am served an exquisite salmon sashimi dish. When I open the lid, a pop-out book mechanism causes some small flowers to pop out. Beneath the flowers lies the prized fish. The cook explains that each strip of sashimi is covered with a strip of poison; as long as you remove the strip and do not put the strip in your mouth, the food is completely safe.
Well lo and behold somehow I find myself chewing on this poisonous strip that I had just removed from my fish. "How did that get in my mouth?" I wonder. Incidentally, a generic girl beside me had suffered a similar fate; she too accidentally put the poison strip in her mouth. Anyway, it is too late. I am going to die from the cancer that this poison gives me. Ah, but maybe I can go back in time to remedy the problem by NOT eating the poisonous strip.
I ask my quantum physics professor (not a real person in real life): "If I go back in time and avoid eating the poison, will that fix everything?" The professor answers in the negative. I am greatly confused by this, since common sense would say that going back in time and avoiding the poison WOULD fix the problem. I ask some of the professor's students this very same question and they answer, "Yes, of course it would work." So I go back to the professor and he proceeds to explain exactly why it wouldn't work. It is a very complex explanation involving several case studies of experiments by Heisenberg and Schrodinger's cat. One such research article was titled something like "Heisenberg, Schrodinger, and a cat." The results of these experiments imply that going back in time to change something will have no effect on the resulting state of the universe; despite how hard you try, even if you blow up a building, in 5 minutes everything will have returned to normal. It is all very confusing to me but gradually I begin to be convinced that the professor is correct, even though I do not understand the proof at all.
So I try it. I go back in time. I carefully avoid eating the poison. I even avoid eating the fish entirely. Yet, just as the professor had predicted, 5 minutes later I can feel that all-too-familiar bitter aftertaste of the cancerous poison in my mouth, despite that I had not ingested anything! I realize that the quantum physics professor knew what he was talking about, and there is no way to remedy my situation.
A few days later I learn that the girl who also ate the poison strip had died. Her exposure was far more severe, because she chewed on it longer than I did whereas I spit it out almost immediately, so she died first. Nonetheless, I knew my end would come eventually. Already, I was feeling sick. Moments later I threw up. Some generic people beside me (only my sister is recognizable) tried to comfort me. I tasted the vomit carefully, trying to decide whether or not all of this was a dream. The feeling of vomiting and the taste/texture of vomit both felt quite real. I felt a bit dreamy but that could have been explained by an altered state of mind brought about by the sickness. I could not make a decision on whether or not I was dreaming, until I woke up.
We are in sweet tomatoes when the fire alarm goes off. We all evacuate the building and go towards our car. 4 people are following us and trying to make conversation about the alarm. We soon realize they are only trying to mug us; they set up the alarm to evacuate the people from the restaurant to prevent any witnesses from seeing them through the window.
So as this gang is trying to mug us, the 3 other family members get in the car. A big black dude puts me in a leg bar but I break free and punch his head into concrete, because I am just that awesome. As my dad starts driving the van forward, the other three muggers chase me. One grabs me by the waist just as I am swinging onto the roof of the van. The mugger turns into a big (human-sized) evil version of Wall-e. I lean forward and throw the wall-e forwards such that he lands on the ground in front of the van.
My dad does not run him over and keeps driving. That was a mistake. Wall-e gets back up and fires two precision laser shots, disabling our back tires. Now the car is inching forward only very slowly and wall-e is about to get us. I grab a long pole and start banging wall-e's head from side to side until his head comes off. Now he is blind. For good measure I walk him and pull his arms out of their sockets and then his legs. Then I crush his torso. Now he is just pieces of scrap metal.
I wake up very sad that the plot had to end this way. Wall-e used to be a very cute robot and only recently turned evil. I talk to my sister about my dream. "What an ingenious plot device by the director of Wall-e," I tell her, "to have the AUDIENCE kill wall-e at the end! That makes it extra sad since wall-e used to be so cute."
Then after a moment I realize that my dream wasn't the same as the actual plot in the movie. So I say, "Wow, I'm going to write down my dream because my plot is way more dramatic/intense than the movie plot."
Then I wake up for real.
We are on a train. The train stops. The station "doors" open.
The station doors are REALLY confusing. So confusing that Johnny Hwang is all like "WHATHAFACK?!" They are a maze. They open, and I step through one set of doors, but I'm not really sure if I'm in the station yet, because there's a maze of fences made from blue metallic mesh. I step through yet another set of doors and it seems I just got closer to the train again!
"The doors are closing. Please stand clear of the doors."
Well I am clear of the doors but DAMN these metallic mesh fences are CLOSING ON ME. AHHH I'm going to be crushed alive! "WHATHAFACK" says Johnny again. We are shortly thereafter crushed alive.
I feel... restrained... as if in hibernation or suspended animation, but alive. Why am I still alive, even unhurt? Ah, therein lies the GENIUS of this crushing system. You see, it left our BLOOD VESSELS intact. Yes, and that's all we need to survive. Our blood vessels. It somehow circumvented all of our vital organs and is now encasing all of our blood vessels in metallic material, with microscopic precision. Don't ask me how it was able to trap our blood vessels in a fine mesh without even breaking our skin/muscle/bones/brain/heart; this is dream logic. "How am I going to get out of this trap?" I think to myself. "Ah, requires too much brain power to think of some creative plot device... would rather wake up," responds my brain.
Solution: In retrospect, we could have simply waited for the next train to arrive. The doors and fences would then have opened, thereby freeing our blood vessels. Then we could have used that precious time to try to get free of the station before the doors closed again.
I just saw Doubt (2008).
Pedophiles and animalphiles are distinct from other people of uncommon sexual desire (such as LGBT community) because many argue that the objects of their desire have no ability to consent. They are shunned by society even in comparison to LGBT's, but for what reasons?
1. Are animals capable of consent? I would think that if an animal did not give any signs of resistance and orgasmed then it would qualify as consent, no? Who are we to say that they "can't think for themselves and therefore it is bad for them"?
2. Are children capable of consent? Children are humans aka pretty damn smart and would probably give resistance if they did not like something. Anyway puberty hits as early as 9. Some say children just don't know any better or don't know what they want or are confused, but I am averse to that sort of PC fluff-talk and would like evidence to support it.
Whether or not animals or children are capable of consent, I feel sorry for all those weird people. They did not ASK to be born with such strange sexual desires. The only reason these people are branded as disgusting creepers who deserve no sympathy, is that society is full of myopic band-wagoners who are too pea-brained to place themselves in someone else's shoes.
3. Do you feel sorry for pedophiles and/or animal-philes? Why or why not?
